the end of us! Joereen has been disconnected...

Last week I was so happy writing about the love blossom in my heart. Something happen between us and we can’t do anything to save this. I tried. I really tried but a man has to make his choices and I am just not one of them. One day he said how much he missed me and need me but then the feelings just vanished and all he can say is “Just take care of your self, Bye”.

How did we end up? By sms. Was it a joke? Nope! Hurm a six years relationship was ended by text. I am heartbroken now. I cant deny tears will be my closest companion in the next few months. What hurt most is that I love him to the max. My family likes him and I have loved his family too... How can a woman heart be broken so many times by the same guy and why when things have been patch they hurt us again? It will be hard for me. I don’t blame him, partly it was my fault but he started it and it lead me to become some one he is not too keen to be with. Then again I may lead to this break up but he wanted it to happen. Worst of all it is by text? Am I that bad to deserve this break up by text? It’s time for me to move on. It’s not going to be easy I need time and guts... because right now I am so weak and I can’t really think the right thing to do. I don’t want him to go but I don’t have a choice. The memories with him will always remain as the best that I ever had and I hope the same goes for him. I will not say this is a nasty break up but then again maybe this is the right thing for him to do. I just turned 25 and I taught we will get married next year, he even gave me hope for it. All I can think is it was not made for us and I am not good enough for him.

The past six years was a bumpy journey but I love it. He taught me a lot, he made me smile he made me cried he made me laugh he made me learn that people deserve a second chance. I love him. Always and forever till I learn to love again but only time will lead me to something new because while we were together never once slip my mind that I will be with someone else except him.

To Joe’s family, thanks for being nice while I was still his girlfriend. I have learned to love all of you because everyone has given me chances to be a part of you. It is hard to let go but in the end it is not working out for us. If in any way we crossed path please do stop by for a quick chat ok! There’s always joy and pain in this world and no matter what life has to go on.

Dear friend’s you have known us as a couple, but on 9th April 2009 we are no longer being together because he has made his choice and I have tried my best not to let go but it is coming to an end. To my girlfriends I am lucky to have shoulders to cry too. To my dad thanks for listening and to mummy thanks for asking but your daughter here will learn to move on. Just give me some time to do so. I am in a mess now but I will catch up soon. Thanks for the love that you shared Joe and thanks for the time when you was there for me through hard times and from the day we have nothing till we gain something to share.

This is a life lesson for me. I love you Joe, always... and will always miss you.

Till we meet again Some fine day..Good day all.

Sometimes we will not get what we want.

It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone, an hour to like someone, and a day to love someone, but it takes a lifetime to forget someone. Anonymous

Love is like the truth, sometimes it prevails, sometimes it hurts.Victor M. Garcia Jr

and then he's gone....

only hope.. pray... can make miracle happen. Stop being down and it's time to look forward girl.

Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.-Kahlil Gibran

So do tell me if you hope for it too...

Staring blank to a pointless view

I realize how much I love you,

Even I know I am always the One,

waiting for the phone to ring or just for it to blip...

always secretly wishing that it is from you.

You know I will sew those buttons even I have no clue how to do...

and I will cook the meal you like even if I dislike.

but dear I will take one step back...

if I know that in me you can only LIKE.

from the beginning it was never easy,

i hope that you and me will always last.

So do tell me if you hope for it too... just for us to last.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------azreen azlan.

If I had a single flower for every time I think about you, I could walk forever in my garden. ~Claudia Ghandi

Confessions of a Shopaholic (MOVIE)

Rebecca Bloomwood (Isla Fisher) is a sweet and charming New York City girl who has a tiny, little problem that is rapidly turning into a big problem: she's hopelessly addicted to shopping and drowning in a sea of debt. While Rebecca has dreams of working for a top fashion magazine, she can't quite get her foot in the door—that is, until she snags a job as an advice columnist for a new financial magazine published by the same company.
Overnight, her column becomes hugely popular, turning her into an overnight celebrity, but when her compulsive shopping and growing debt issues threaten to destroy her love life and derail her career, she struggles to keep it all from spiraling out of control...and is ultimately forced to reevaluate what's really important in life.
Based on the best-selling series of books by Sophie Kinsella. (synopsis/pictures taken from some webpage)

I went for the premier few days ahead... and yippie!!! i loved it! loved her books and enjoyed the movie... i soooo wanna watch it again... i know everybody wanna be Becky... and everyone is afraid of their own Derek Smith!! Hahahaha...

"We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops." Henry Youngman

PANIC!!!

As usual it will take me some time to write in my blog.. =) i was kinda busy with some stuff.

Let me start with one incident which take place almost a month ago... (i know i was suppose to write sooner... been busy peeps!) You see on 27th February was my 6th Years anniversary with Joe.. It was an unforgettable memory for me... The day did not start well as i was on my annual leave but then, Joe's leave was not approved for some reason that i refuse to hear... Whole day long i was at home doing nothing. And for the first time i wish that i shouldn't have wasted my Annual Leave...Even though Joe's leave was not approve he manage to change his shift which ended around 8pm but then he only arrived at my parents house around 10.30pm... i was getting pissed! At that time i have not eaten anything from morning. I was so hungry. We headed to Sky Bar and arrived around 11pm plus.. (well i spent my six years of courtship day with him only for 50 minutes of togetherness...) We sat, chat, had some snacks till i couldn't stand the hunger... before 12 am we got in to the car and that's when i discover the cake i ordered from my office colleague is ruined and Joe could not see the words written.. =( ~well the sign of something bad is going to happen just show!~
i cried and he hugged me and took me to Pelita since i was hungry, But i did not get out of the car... we tapau Nasi Goreng Kambing only for me and i ate in the car on the way to Cyber coz my boyfriend here wanna play Futsal with his office mate on our Anniversary. huh! he only spend time with me for less then 2 hours and already thinking of Futsal.

well he then drove to Cyberjaya BACK just for the game.. and... there it is when it all happen...

• Joe got back ache after 20 minutes of playing. he came to us.. (i was with his friends... Malar, Jeff, Dave(he was injured earlier), Shima and Jeff's friend)...
• after making noise and drinking water he just sat there while i went in with Malar to play pool and bitch bout some stuff...
• around 5 am after the game finish and his friends left he just can't move too much.
• took him to the car but he can barely walk.
• He then ask me to drive his car... Guess what peeps...? i don't have any license and i am afraid to drive
• Lucky it is an auto car and lucky enough i can drive IT!
• i took the risk and drove him all the way from cyberjaya to Kepong my parents house... have too.
• i was lucky we arrived safely.
• i took him in and make him lye down on a bed...
• around 11 he cant stand the pain and he couldn't move.
• My dad had to call the ambulance and i went and ride in it with him.
• Joe's sister came to my house earlier and followed the back of the ambulance.
• registered him and went back for some circumstances.
• Only Visit him the second day at night...
• Went to office with swollen eyes which people can barely notice...
• had lots heart to heart talk with some people...
• but i visit him every night until he discharge.
• Doctor diagnose him as slip disc. A minor one which need physio therapy and from now onwards he cannot do any hard work! (excuses Joe! Excuse!)
  

this was before the incident... At Sky Bar.

Well that's all for my Panic!!!

"It doesn’t matter where you go in life, what you do ….. it’s who you have beside you." Unknown.

25!

i turned 25 last Friday (6th Feb 09!)and still in shock and still living in a denial moment..i wish i would believe it at least for a moment there....

The best birthdays of all are those that haven't arrived yet.- Robert Orben

Fear and Courage of the "I Do.."

THE thought of a wedding or a marriage have cross my mind again... though i have written once about it in my old blog but today i cant resist putting it out again.

Well it all started late in the afternoon today.... when i saw the wedding mags. at that point i just realize that the DATE that i want is coming rather closer to me but i am in no preparation at all. I am scared or excited, a feeling i just can't describe it. Will it happen or it will just pass. Some question i Can't answer... Will it be with the right man, will it be the right day? Or is the outfit gonna be just like i want it to be.. will all my friends come in Pink. i am clueless with my stats, What i really want or do i really have faith in myself or is it just a peer presure?

Will i get married on the date that i wanted since years ago. Will it come true??

I am just a girl with high hopes and imagination to have my Dream Wedding... But I am NOT ready to be a wife just yet let alone the perfect wife for my husband.

Do I dare to do it? or sould i take the risk and go through life with lesson learned from every steps that i stumble?

only time and tide will tell...

It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare.It is because we do not dare that they are difficult.~ Seneca ~